-- Truth Be Told Quotes
No doubt being on the receiving end of good things makes
you feel like a winner. But what about when other people get
something they want—a good grade, a new opportunity, praise?
Does their win, by default, make you a loser? Of course not.
Someone else’s success doesn’t have to be your failure. The fact that your sister got inducted into the Cat-hair Weavers Hall of Fame doesn’t have to be about you at all.
At a minimum, you’re denying yourself a lot of opportunities to share in some joy. Think about it… if you’re only happy at your own success, you only get to be joyful when you do something great. But if you share your sister’s, best friends’, colleagues’ joy when they do well, you get joy to infinity. And I mean, she is making you all those cute cat-hair scarves.
This quote can help teens become more self aware about what influences their emotions. It’s natural to feel a pang of jealousy when someone else has a success. It’s necessary to have some healthy competition to drive people to achieve greater accomplishments. But sometimes, that jealousy or competitiveness can be unhealthy. One person's success does not have to mean someone else’s failure. And more than one person can feel joy for the same accomplishment.
What is the motivation behind these reactions? Jealousy and competitiveness. By being self aware of where the reaction is coming from, teens can do a healthier job of processing their emotions and preserving their relationships. Using one’s competitiveness to push to do better next time— that’s great. Taking out your emotions on someone else— that’s not so great.
To go a step further, by taking joy in a friend or sibling’s accomplishment for its own sake, we get extra opportunities to be happy and joyful with someone we care about. When you take joy in others’ joy, you get joy to infinity.
If you want super bonus points, consider that we each have qualities or accomplishments that are worth celebrating. It’s ok for one friend, sibling, etc. to be celebrated for some accomplishments and the other to be celebrated for others. Maybe this time it’s one person’s turn, and next time it’s someone else’s. There’s peace to be found by discovering and embracing the qualities in yourself that you want to celebrate, even though they may be different than someone you admire.
Questions to prompt discussion, journaling, essays for high school health class and social emotional development lessons:
Activities and worksheets for teen SEL / high school health and wellness lessons: